Rector's Blog: Raise Your Hand

I attended a private Christian school, so Mr. Ahlers was allowed to say this, but I had never actually heard it before. I didn’t know one could just believe there were no dinosaurs. You should know at this point that I was not a science-oriented kid. I did not like educational programming – and to this day I still try not to learn anything while watching TV if I can help it. I have a son who memorizes animal and dinosaur facts and I love that about him, but that has never been me. But still, as a ten-year-old I had heard of dinosaur fossils and bones. Which is why I immediately asked him what about the fossils and bones.

Mr. Ahlers said that God had put those in the ground. I asked why God would do that and he said in order to test our faith. I expressed incredulity. He doubled down, “What? Don’t you think God could create fossils and bones and put them in the ground to test us?” To which I responded, “Of course I think he could do that, I just don’t think God would be such a jerk.” And that, my friends, was when I was kicked out of class.

The Second and third times I got kicked out of class were for arguing with my teacher. Also the fourth time. That fourth time was the last time. I was a sophomore in high school. More private Christian education. In my Theology class our teacher Mr. Swanson handed out a one-sheet paper that said “Sex Quiz” at the top. It was a series of True/False statements. We took the quiz and then he gave us the correct answers. One of the True/False statements was “A person can be sexually active with multiple partners without contracting an STD.” I had marked True. Mr. Swanson said the correct answer was False. I raised my hand.

I did not get kicked out that day. I began to argue with my teacher – whose “quiz” was designed to scare us into abstinence – but I remembered the dinosaurs and bit my lip. Also, as a 15 year old with no sexual experience and an aversion to educational programming, even though I knew he was wrong, I couldn’t prove he was wrong. That day I stepped foot in the school library for the first time ever. I asked the librarian how to find books about sex and STD statistics. She asked why and I said I had to prove Mr. Swanson wrong. She laughed, then pointed me in the right direction. I studied. I gathered data. I wrote the kind of half page thesis on sex and STDs that a 15-year-old with no sexual experience and a private school education would write. I brought it back to Theology class the next day, and as he was beginning class, I raised my hand. Five minutes later I was in the hallway.

My old boss used to say to his Confirmation class that being Episcopalian is more a state of mind than a set of clearly defined beliefs. He’d say you don’t really become an Episcopalian – you just probably always were one and didn’t know it. Then he’d do his variation on the Jeff Foxworthy jokes and say, “You might already be an Episcopalian if…” I remember the first time I heard him do this and he said, “If you were the one who always raised your hand in class and said, ‘wait a minute,’ you were probably already an Episcopalian.

I guess I was always an Episcopalian. I have always talked back. It’s a gift both my parents gave me. They may not have loved it about me, but they were the same way. I learned from them. I have always asked questions. I have always questioned authority. I have always had the tendency towards irascibility, especially when something seemed unfair or unreasonable. I have always raised my hand.

I must admit though that the stakes have always been pretty low for me. I have a colleague who asks people like me how we can consider ourselves priests if we’ve never been arrested. Isn’t that great? I haven’t been arrested because of course I haven’t. I like to question authority when the worst it can do is kick me out of class. I like to be irascible from my couch.

I am a person who is occupied by the desire to seem reasonable. Even the teachers I confronted – I felt comfortable doing that because I felt like I was speaking out for being reasonable. I remember many years ago a friend of mine saying, “If you’re not outraged, you’re not paying attention,” and I said, “Maybe I’m not outraged because I’m well adjusted.” The clever retort in defense of seeming reasonable, middle-of-the-road.

I want to follow Jesus.

Jesus isn’t middle-of-the-road. Jesus isn’t a moderate. Jesus isn’t concerned with seeming reasonable. Our Scriptures actually call Jesus reason incarnate. His way of living is, according to our tradition, the very definition of reason.And Jesus does not embody reason by maintaining a veneer of objectivity or engaging in low-risk confrontation. Jesus does not just raise his hand when it’s safe.

And I know. I know you’re wondering if I’m going to say Jesus was progressive. Or Jesus was conservative. Those are our labels. That’s our spectrum. Jesus is a radical who insists on the dignity and belovedness of every human being. He insists on feeding the hungry, housing the homeless, caring for the sick, loving your enemy, praying for those who persecute you, turning the other cheek. He comes in the long line of the prophets of Israel who are completely and consistently and utterly unreasonable in their insistence that God is present, that God is loving, that God seeks justice, and that God is inviting us to participate in the work of building equitable and compassionate communities with no margins or castaways.

When Jesus raises his hand, he is arrested. His execution is perfectly legal. It’s capital punishment. It’s seen as reasonable. A comfortable, moderate position.

God is Love and Everyone is In. That is radical. If you try to live it, you’re going to have to raise your hand.