Sacred Connections: How Do We Love Each Other?
How do we love each other? Jesus commands us to do this. He offers some guidance about forgiveness, about justice, about not-judging and responding to those in need. There are so many lessons to draw from, and yet sometimes the “how?” seems beyond our grasp. In these days, it seems hard to find steady ground, to get our footing and move forward from here.
Many of us have made a conscious decision to limit our intake of news, but it doesn’t take much intake to alert us to the conflicts and challenges confronting ourselves, our neighbors, our state, our country, our world – everything in God’s creation. Yes, all of this tragedy and heroism, anger and concern, injustice and advocacy, chaos and beauty and potential are there for us. How do we cherish our world? How do we love one another?
A couple of evenings ago I had my monthly dinner with a dear, dear old friend. He and I have known each other for over 40 years and we now are also both up there in age. We first met when I was wanting to volunteer to be a “big sister” to a teen caught up in the juvenile justice system. Later we worked together in Diversity at P&G and continued collaboration in our service with Cincinnati Children’s. We’ve shared so many stories as we’ve watched our families grow and delighted in the next generation. We are of different races, have had different life experiences, are called to different work right now. But those differences broaden our understanding and enrich our lives. Our friendship is grounded in love, the love Christ calls us to.
I mention my friend, because were it not for him, I might be sitting comfortably in my safe home, with income to pay for my food, and freedom to feel at ease walking in my neighborhood, with no known COVID-19 infection nearby. My friend is part of a family funeral home, trying to render the most compassionate service to grieving families in their surrounding area. He sees many victims of COVID-19, as well as victims of gun violence, as well as those who have suffered from lack of resources that have compromised their health. Were it not for our friendship, those stories might seem more like remote headlines, and not also the reality of life in our very own community. Seeing the toll of the tragedy he witnesses daily, in his eyes, on his face, in his gait, denial is not an option for me.
There is a tension that may always be present, but sometimes less visceral than it is right now. Tension arises out of our different life circumstances and experiences, and it is so visible today whether we’re looking at the impact of COVID-19, or violence, or imprisonment, or financial and food security, or employment, or resiliency. The gulfs between us may seem so vast and the difficulties beyond our reckoning. Yet Jesus calls us to unity. Jesus calls us to love.
How do we love each other? We are all unique children of God with our individual life stories, needs, concerns, feelings, hopes, and fears. We need so desperately to honor these differences by listening to each other, by bearing witness for each other, by accepting the limitations of each of our experiences and visions. We are all in such a place of unknowing, whether we know that or not. It is unsettling and can take us to places of withdrawal or attack. Neither are long term paths of love.
Phil wrote in his blog on Wednesday, “The only obedient response to Jesus is love for one another. The only freedom we have is in serving one other.” We may not always know how to love one another, but we can show up for each other. We can listen, we can seek to understand, we can learn, we can share, we can bear witness, we can serve as we are able. The steady ground is our faith and relationship with God. Our path is our heartfelt longing to walk in Christ’s love.
